Should we elope and have a party later?

Choosing to elope doesn't mean you have to forgo a celebration with family and friends. Many couples are opting for an elopement ceremony first, followed by a party at a later date.

"We don't want a big fuss, as we would like to keep it intimate that morning, just for us, and then celebrate later in the day."

One of my couples mentioned this in their inquiry, and they are not the only ones. As a wedding celebrant specializing in elopements, I'm providing more insight into this growing trend of tying the knot.

How does eloping and having a celebration afterward work?

Imagine a classic wedding where guests attend the ceremony, witness the couple's marriage, and then, typically after a pause for the couple to take photos, everyone transitions to the reception, which is the celebratory party.

By eloping and hosting a party afterward, you divide the conventional wedding structure into two distinct segments:

1.    A personal, secluded ceremony attended only by the two witnesses or a small group of select individuals.

2.   A 'reception', gathering, or festivity scheduled for a later date.

You still hold the ceremony, but with very few guests or possibly none, and the ceremony is separate from the reception.

Why choose to elope and celebrate with a party later instead of having a traditional wedding? 

Couples may opt for this choice for several reasons.

Couples who aren't aligned with how they want to get married

Quite frequently, I officiate weddings where one partner desires a large celebration with all the extravagance, while the other would be content to sign the marriage documents at the kitchen table in their pajamas. Thus, opting for a small elopement ceremony followed by a celebration party later can serve as a great compromise, allowing both individuals to feel they are getting the wedding they desire. Marriage is fundamentally about compromise, so it's crucial to start your marriage in a way that satisfies both of you.

Maintaining the Privacy of Your Vows

Some individuals may not be at ease sharing their deepest emotions with a large audience. If you experience shyness or anxiety about reciting your vows before many people, opting for a very intimate marriage ceremony—such as eloping—might make you feel more comfortable.

Photos Without Leaving Your Guests

One benefit of an elopement ceremony is that you can have your couple’s photo shoot immediately after the ceremony without having to leave your guests. In contrast to a 'traditional' wedding, where guests often have to wait for hours between the ceremony and the reception while the couple takes photos, your guests simply join you at the start of the party. This allows you more time to enjoy the company of all the amazing people you've invited to celebrate with you, and it spares your guests from awkwardly waiting for the reception to begin. It's a win-win!

Some of my elopement couples choose to have their photos taken before the ceremony. With no large crowd to handle, there's much more flexibility in scheduling both the ceremony and the photos at an elopement.

Shared moments

In a 'traditional' wedding, the couple is occupied from the start of the ceremony until the end of the reception. This method provides an opportunity for both of you to enjoy some quiet moments together between the ceremony and the celebration, allowing you to simply be with each other and reflect on your recent marriage!

Creating your own traditions

You can book a venue and still incorporate all your favorite wedding reception traditions, such as arriving after your guests so they cheer when you enter.

You may appreciate certain aspects of a traditional wedding reception, such as cutting a cake or having a ‘first dance,’ but prefer not to have the entire event. With this choice, you can simply incorporate the elements you desire.

Alternatively, you might choose to skip all traditional wedding reception elements and opt for a pizza party at home or a dinner at the pub with a group of friends.

You decide. Make choices that light the two of you up.